Sunday, October 21, 2007 . 1:36 PM
It's time to update my blog again. Been so busy that i didn't even have time to come online.
1st of all, last Tuesday i took leave for my performance at Presbyterian High School. I always thought that it's a boys' school? haha sorry i was wrong. It's mixed. For pple who has no idea where it is, it's just opposite Yio Chu Kang Mrt. I was supposed to reach there before 10am for the rehearsal. It was their Art Fest. So good rite? Kids nowadays still have Art Fest, in my time, we only had Chinese New Yr Performance or whateevr school opening ceremony kinda stuffs. K lar, we did have some rather interesting performances that the school asked pple from outside to come n perform for us...
Anyway, they scheduled our rehearsal at 10am, but when i reached, i didn't get to rehearse till 10.30am and was so short, my instructor and i ended up rehearsing ourselves on the hall's floor. I took a cab to the school becos i had so many things to bring with me. 4 dances to perform, hence all the costumes, shoes. Even my hair, i had to do it myself. But i tot i was really smart, i managed to do up my hair like an AH MAH aka the usual-ballroom-dance-hairstyle. Did my makeup, this is surprisely the most simple makeup i did for any performances, bcos i tot since it's in school, there's no point making myself look like a diva :P Just kidding. But simple is good, that meant i spent less time fussing over make up.
So the programme line up were like there were a number of students singing, certain musical instrumental performance, beat boxing. The school also invited an accapella girl grp, one of the singers is from the band playing in WALA WALA on Sats, her name is Sara. Wanted to talk to her, since i've been to Walas a number of occasion and i think she found me familar when we met each other at the school.
Being back brought back alot of memories. Memories of the 4 years back in Sec school. How do i explain this? hmm.. I spent 4 years in sec school in a school dancing club. NO i was not in chinese dance club altho yes we do perform chinese dancing for chinese new year celebrations. I was in modern dance. When my present instructor says that i've not been thru much sufferings for dance, i do partially disagree. I did went thru all the difficult trainings in the past. It was so much sufferings that i precisely decided not to go back to dancing after i graduate. But of cos i've always loved dancing. Trainings in the past were bittersweet, thinking back now. It was horrible. Normal students spend a couple of hours a week, like 3-4 hrs a week on their ECAs (now it's CCAs), but pple in dance clubs like me, we spent around 2-3 times a week, each time is 3-4 hrs practicing, training, doing our acrobatic-similar stunts. What to do? I chose that right? If there are performances coming up, we can expect our holidays to be totally burnt. We would be coming back to school almost everyday and since there were no school in the day, that's even better! My instructor would drill us for the whole day. WHOLE DAY ok. I remembered we started early in the morning like 9am till 3-4 pm. Everyday. Shd i be complaining? It's more than 10 years ago anyway. And to compare this to dancers who train overseas? Those were NOTHING. I agree that for my dancing now, i didn't sacrifice much. That's also cos i can't possibly sacrifice when i have nothing to sacrifice rite? Like i have no money, i only have time. Time is the only thing i sacrifice for dancing. Everything else, my instructor is helping me. I don't even need to go overseas and pay thousands of money to learn from the champions, bcos he had aldy went and learn from so many of them long ago and he just passes everything he knows to me. Where do i get such gd deals ???
When i walked into the school hall, everyone on rehearsal would cast me weird and curious stares. Some gals were really friendly, they smiled and said hi shyly. The boys weren't that shy, they just kept saying helo to me. Pretty funny actually. Since i used to spend long hours on stage and backstage back in school, i always found the backstage somewhat nostalgic. The curtains besides the stage is always at an angle, slanting, so that the audience won't be able to see what goes on at the side of the stage, but we are able to see them.
We grabbed a student to help us video the 4 dances. I muz say he did a great job, he even zoomed in at some point of each dance for us. This is the 1st time i do so many dances in a row. Was kinda hard to catch my breath. Waltz and tango together, then a break for 2 chinese songs in the middle performed by a gal and boy. Then Bachata and Salsa. The students were so cute i tell ya. They were cheering at every little small sexy things that they made mi laughed- on stage. EVERY little thing.When we came out dressed with our ballroom attires, they went like woah.....so nice......woah... cheered and clapped. SO funny. So i did enjoy the performance bcos the response was great. It made me wanna do more in fact.
Anyway i can't show u guys the videos, bcos we don't wan pple to see our cheorography and copy them. I've captured screenshots tho.
We borrowed the skirt from a Tai Tai which cost a few hundred dollars. It was really nice, bcos it created such a flair when i turn, that really gives the ballroom feel to the dances. The shawl looking thing on my hands were my instructor's masterpiece. He went to look for that cloth and made everything together so that i can tie on my hands and pin it to my top and skirt. The top we got it from City Plaza. It has many shiny glittery beads sewn on it so it was really nice under the spot light. And check out my AH mah hair style. I used a huge pin behind to secure my hair, which has crystals, so under the spotlight, my hair looked quite classily done.
Waltz. 
Tango
Salsa. There are always students behind the curtains watching the performance. They kinda remind me of myself in the past, where i would also stationed there waiting for our performance while watching others perform, our heartbeats pounding faster as our turn approaches. Everytime i dance on stage, and turn sideways i'll see those pple besides the curtains hidden from view. Soemtimes they would cheer or make funny faces. It's hard to concentrate when u know there are pple at the sides looking at you as well.
Salsa
Bachata
Bachata's ending pose....as i slide down his legs...
After that, i met up with Albert for a while, before i headed home to rest. I still had to go to paya lebar at night for competitive cha cha class.
The next day i returned to work. This week of work, i'm beginning to feel abit sian. Why? Bcos i realised that there are some politics. Begining to see it...not the whole office, from one gal only. Personally i think she's making a big fuss over nothing. And i'm just stuck being having to listen to her bitchings and another girl whom i think is just doing her job and there's nothing wrong with it. I don't think there's anything thing with anything juz that the gal thinks she needs to bitch. AH......................... i hate it. In MY WORLD, there's no gossips, no bitchings, no politics. I don't like it. It's not as if i have never tasted what the real world is like, where pple bitch abt pple or be two-headed snakes. It's not that. In fact, i've tasted them way back in pri sch!!! I didn't like it. Altho i'm hardly the one that pple bitched about ( but then again, i won't know right? if they had bitched about mi, how would i know...), i don't like the fact that these pple are bitching about others and wans me to join them. For goodness sake, if everyone can be less biased about each other, this world would be a better place. Don't drag me down with all your bitchings. Don't make mi listen to your bitchings either, there are an ear sore.
For myself, i have a number of pple who pisses me off everyday. Do i retaliate with anger? Sometimes. But i catch myself before i start doing more. I don't wan to do more. What for? I don't lash out at others unless they start pushing me 1st right? It's just not right. Even if pple starts it 1st, i shdn't fight back blindly, like how they would react if it were them in my shoes. Then i would be the same kind of pple like THEM. I juz complain to my friends, if they are willing to listen and 4get about them UNTIL they come n piss me off another time probably, then i would complain again. Do i go bitching about them to other colleagues.....??? hai..sian..
My mom on the other hands, still thinks that i'm not helping out at home enuff. I've stayed home last Sunday without going to church just to do houseworks. Is she happy? Gez her satisfaction with me only lasted 2 days? Every Sat or Sun she would tell mi the same things. Please wash your clothes. Sometimes i don think i have much clothes to handwash? everything can go into the machine. So what do i do? I wash some clothes, so that she sees that i doing something! I mop the floor, clear the rubbish in my room (it's never ending) and clean the toilet, wash the dishes and my clothes. My hands are degenerating along with every weekends, becoming rougher n rougher. If i don't make it to be a tai tai, i think i can make an astounding housewife; a very lazy one though whose husband probably has to end up cleaning up everything.
THIS IS HOW I'm going to spend MY sunday today as well. DOing houseworks. How many girls out there are like me? That they have to push away schedules and appointments juz to go home n do houseworks! I'm not even complaining. I know this is how my mom feels love and i'm willing to do it so that she feels loved. But i onli wish her contentment can last abit more, that she can be more appreciative, that she doesn't say till i never do anything, that she can be more understanding. All she ever tells me all the time is to drop my dancing, and stop going out so much n wake up earlier. U see, everything goes in a circle. I can't stop my dancing bcos i think it's what i have to depend on as a livelihood in the future. I wan to accomplish something for my own self before i'm too old and starts to regret that i didn't when i had the chance to? Hence, i have to spend 3 days a week dancing .And that's not alot by many dancers' standard. In fact that's TOO LITTLE. But what can i do? I can only afford 3 days and that's alot BY MY STANDARD. And so i have friends to go out with, and some last minute thing that may pop up, bf to meet up(not that it's a chore), church to go and cell grp to take care of. A person can ONLY do so much per week. I have 24 hrs like everyone else on this planet. But i'm squeezing so many things, trying to do my best already, why can't she juzt be more understanding. No i can't give up my friends right? I have my own life right? How can i give up my friends. And i got so many friends. hahahah... That's y sometimes i have to start planning my schedules 3 weeks in advance so that i can go out with this grp this week, the other grp next week, or another one after 2 weeks. I try to be at home 2 weekdays per week. Even so, i'm really tired. I muz say my endurance and stamina is really good. But when i'm at home, i get too lazy, i don't wan to do houseworks. And then my mom will come n complain that i'm not helping on weekends. That i'm not waking up enuff. Helo MA......i have to struggle to wake up everyday for work liao, so tired n everything can't i even sleep abit later on sat? and JUST ON SATURDAYS?!!!! When i aldy have been waking up early every saturday for the past almost one year for driving?! Can't i even have some privilege?! Sunday don need to say lar, got to go whole day of church have to wake up earlier. This is y, when i changed my job, i couldn't cope with everything, i was so tired, till now i have not been to church service. So it's been more than a mth. I went once during this one over mth tho. Bcos i was tooooo tired. I don't blame anyone, only myself. Bcos i think my time management still suck. I could have slept earlier but becos i wanted time for myself to juz surf around etc, i ended up sleeping late n hence no church. See? I wan to meet my friends, i want to dance, i need to do hseworks , yet i also wan my own time for myself, how? can i split myself up?
That's y i need a freaking organiser in my O2 to help mi remember all the events, things i have to do.
I have a wedding dinner to attend tonight. I'm not so happy abt it. Bcos i'm going with someone who has pissed mi off again n again many times over the months. I hope he doesn't piss mi off tonite, i doubt he has the guts to piss anyone off face to face, he always does it on MSN. If he does, i'm going to scold. I'm not going to be the nice girl, come on.....i'm not mean bcos i chose not to be mean ok. Don't take advantage of that. Anyway,the groom is innocent right? So i shd go for the dinner even tho i don have money and this will burn another big hole in my pockets. Sigh.
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