Friday, December 09, 2005 . 5:08 PM
** Merry Xmas **
Long long time ago, i used to go to church with my mom. Actually not that long ago, and the truth was my mom forced brought me to church. I was prob in pri 2. She wanted to get the certificate of attendance of a methodist church so as to facilitate my brother's application for a methodist pri sch (very near my hse..and i shall not mention the name to protect their reputation n privacy) Somehow my mom also made me go to church with her even though her certificate of attandance has nothing to do with me. I 4got to mention yes my mom is a christian. A christian born into a christian family by birth.
She placed me in a cute little chinese sunday school. Obviously, it was cos she attended the chinese service. And how i hated the sunday school. Although i have a firm grasp of my chinese, the things that was taught or talked abt, or sung abt during sunday sch didn't make sense to me. On top of that, we have our bible studying grp (which is equivalent to a cell grp, except u picture like 10 little kids at the table trying to write answers in their book in CHINESE, not to mention it's fan ti zi...) Onli God knows how much i hated sundays...how much i hated sunday schools.
Eventually my mom got her certificate and we still attended church for sometime but how long exactly i can no longer remember.
My years in pri sch were spent hating christians. My maths teacher then is a christian, she loved doing funny loving things to us and telling us abt how much God loves us. I thought she was being obsessed.
My dad used to gloat at me on sundays, asking me,' Why today never go church n see GOd ah?'
-_- as if God needs to b contained in a church??
I can't remember much of wat happened during those years in sunday sch.
Then i went to secondary school..and i met a girl whose name is Doris in year one. She joined our class after the 1st semester. She was away in UAE for 2 years and came back to singapore then. WE became pretty good frens and somehow chatted abt church. We found out that we were from the same church, but i think she was in the english sunday school.
We were just kids then. We never stepped out of our house unless necessary..and we didn't go anywhere except going to school or being with parents in those days. It was out of ordinary that we did wat we did later on. Till now, it defies my common sense as to what exactly happened.
One day, of what i always remember as being in seconday 2..we actually went to church, ourselves. OUT of nowhere. And as any adults mind would tell u now, how do u actually go to church juz like that, u need this...u need a fren who's in there to take u..u need to know the time..u need to know other things abt the church b4 u actually decide to go.. We just went! And i remembered we went straight to the sunday sch area, there were many classrooms(it's also a kindergarden) and we saw a guy in one of the classrooms. WE approached him (how the hell we got the courage i donoe..i mean i don even know wat kind of question to ask rite?) and told him something along the line of we wanting join church...hilarious. Somehow i think he got someone to tok to us...
All i could remember was, a young woman and a gal around my age came n spoke to us. The young woman to Doris and the gal to me...at that time i didn't know wat exactly it was. But now i know, they were telling mi abt the 4 spiritual laws* (http://www.greatcom.org/laws/english/). Going thru how God loves me, how the whole thing works and at the end of it, asked if i am willing to accept Christ in my life, and if i am willing, pray this prayer with her. I donoe y...i donoe wat made mi did it..its not as if i lost my sense, yes i prayed. I wasn't pressurized or anything. I believed. So i prayed.
"Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you." Matthew 7:7
"Behold, I stand at the door and knock; if any one hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him" (Revelation 3:20).
So, everytime someone asks me how did i become a christian (or how did i come to know of Jesus) my answer would be......i sent myself to God...which is partly true. I did spend a number of yrs in my childhood in church but it's as if i didn't hear wat God was saying..(it was in chinese!) and when i'm ready, He actually sent me to find him...rite that's quite funny, Lord.
For years later on, this young woman whose name is Foong Sim became my sunday sch teacher. And together with her then boyfren and present husband, they guided my class and me very well..preparing us for many things, laying down the foundation that i needed for life, that no matter how far i strayed from God, i still know His words well ( juz that i don't wan to do wat He wans...)
Somehow, i also got involved with this christian organisation, Youth for Christ not long after i recieved Christ at church.They were always hanging outside my sec sch, and i got to know them. As my sunday sch teacher Lionel (the boyfren then) was doing part time ministry work at YFC too. The pple there made sure i have bible study with them. And thus, i had like 2 bible studies per week. One with them, another one with sunday sch..sometimes more. Thinking back, i really thank God for all the pple he had placed there to guide mi thru my foundational years.
Come to think of it..i'm not a young christian anymore. It's been 10 years since i prayed the prayers. (OMG......so old...)
God never says that my life would b smooth when i believed Him...God never says HE will make all things be good to me so that i will never have to taste hard ship.
But God said He loves me alot, enuff to die for me.
My heavenly Father promises me that he will always be with me. And that's a promise and consolation i hold dearly to my heart.
"Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." Hebrews 13:5
As my friends, i'm sure u guys know the pain and sufferings i went thru these few years as my dad fell ill and my family was going thru an emotional turmoil and financial difficulties. There are many things in this world that arent straightforward or easy. It's a lie if i tell u..that things were easy for me even when i believed in God.
Many times i questioned God y did it happen to my family, to me? Y make it so hard for me? I can barely go on with the pain i have...but it is also God who gave me the strength and courage to take on the responsibilities i had to take on, consolation for my tired soul and comfort in the promise that He will provide. Do not worry...
The things that happened to me recently made mi hold on to God even more..bcos only He can take away the pain that i feel...
There aren't many things that i wish to blog about...too bad if ur looking for something more juicy than this. May wat i wrote touch your hearts..and God bless u guys in many ways!
* 4 spiritual laws is a small booklet put together by the founder of campus crusade of Christ to facilitate sharing of the gospel to non-believers. There are other booklets put together by other organisations but juz for example, i said 4 spiritual laws here..
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