Friday, July 29, 2005 . 9:47 AM
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* Sianzations?*
Recently everynite b4 i fall asleep, i'll reflect on my day for probably 5 sec, thank God for bringing me thru the day, and then to my horror the next thing i'll be thinking abt is making a checklist on what there's to be done tomorow at work.
Somehow, my work is my life now. *horror* I determine how well my day went by how much things i've done for the lab, for users and for myself. *doubly horrified*
Things are getting interesting as i speak bcos my boss has suddenly become so hardworking in the sense of recruiting pple. A new Lab officer for my boss's lab has reported for work this week. I don't know if i'm deprived of human contact or wat, i doubt so lar..cos i do have lots of contact with my users..but i was quite excited with an addition of a new member! With him, i hope there's more life inthe lab other than experiments. He happened to be my junior from life sci. My lab's new Lab officer is coming next monday and from my batch too. I wonder how things would change with a new addition. I'm so excited. Then a new master student is joining boss's lab next week too. A new Research assistant too and i have this feeling this research assistant could be from my batch too(but with honours degree). The lab is definetely getting really crowded. I'm waiting with anticipation with how these new pple would change our lab culture. But i'm also alittle worried that they would compete with mi with opportunities for projects...and i curse myself for not trying to start my project earlier....when there were no one ard to compete with me and the path was clear..shit.
omg, look at 90% of the stuffs i wrote and i realised it's all abt work ...damn.
Tonite, i've decided to b more proactive. Sometimes i get too nua and i'll juz contend with staying home when i actually had plans for the night to go somewhere. Tonite i'm gonna make sure i go for it. I'm going down to esplanade,waterfront, there's a live performance by local bands..i've always wanted to go catch such performances ,ie FOC outdoor performances...i seriously think outdoor performances are really cool, we shd have more in singapore. It's getting betta nowadays, it's a matter of u know where n when performances would b held that'all. In the past it's rare chance u would stumble onto such outdoor performances. The next thing that s'poreans need to do is know how to enjoy and let loose of themselves if they really love the performances, like dance in public, shake to the music...i hardly see anyone dance, some malays may do it, and if angmohs are ard they would. I mean wat are the rest doing. I'm nt gonna be the 1st to dance man. Tha'ts so embarrasing..
This week passed really fast, mayb cos tues i had taken half a day off to attend my bro's poly grad ceremony. The grad was a whole damn draggy affair. They juz refused to start the ceremony proper and played clips n clips for us to watch. I muz say it's interesting lar..i makes the school look so gd that if i were a sec sch student doing o'levels i would have chosen the school for further studying. Worth mentioning is the clip showing the top 5 students of the 2004/2005 cohort. One malay gal was so impressive that she won herself many many awards,35 distinctions and donoe how many As. Anyway she was in dept of chemical and life science. She was originally from JC but got into bad company failed and went to poly to do life sci and i can't help notice that the backgrd when she was relating how she fell into bad company. It looked like it's erm acjc ..haha...When the ceremony finally started i've watched an hr of clips and another half an hr so of watching this head of dept of business shake hands with 400+ over students, each time turning to face the cameras as the professional cameramen take their photos. Then finally my brother's deot...rowdy boys..quite funny, they were cheering at each other. And when i tot finally it's all over , there's one more segment for presenting prizes to those students who did exceptionally well...hai..so i sad there for 3 hrs..after that ate some of their food,took some photos n went home n sleep. Well i think we are the onli idiots who are still using the traditional camera instead of digicam..i can't help feeling alittle embarrased. I think it's something quite essential, a must-have for every family i gez. So it's time to get a digicam haha..not now in sept. Someone tipped mi off saying sept there would b a major sales so got to wait till then.
My dad went to see nuh eye specalist yesterday. Referred by the polyclinic. I didn't go so i didn't know wat the doc told my parents anyway. ANd my mom complained that everyone there were indians so she don't understand oso. SHe came back and told mi it's diabetes related, previous diagnosis by polyclinic doc was that my dad has cataract in his right eye. But since now i heard it 's diabetes related i think it's glucoma not cataract(thanz to my cpf trainings..) but my mom don't know! She even said the doc mentioned wat cut off donoe wat and then put a pupil back in. PUPIL?! donoe wat she saying.....................................................................so sci fic..
It's a little sad to mention that 5-6 yrs ago, probably yr 1 in acjc, my dad brought me to the eye clinic at nuh also. Bcos i complained that i could see black dots when i look at things. So i went, doctor said my retina is damaged due to high degree, full of holes so i see black dots. Actually onli one or 2 dots the size of...5mm in diameter? But i suspect that when there are numerous small dots that i can't actually point out but it affects my vision under conditions like when i look straight up at the bright sky...i suspect that other pple don have a problem like mine, they could see things much clearer mine is probably darker? But who knows..i won't know..cos i've always known n seen things like that. How would i know if i'm any different from others. So 6 yrs ago my dad brought mi there. 6 yrs later i bring my dad there(different clinic tho...if not..notice the irony in life...) st wat they do is drip some sort of eye solution into ur eyes so that they could examine ur eyes later on, like an hr later (bcos of the damn waiting time) I do not know the exact purpose of that solution but it seem to dilate ur pupils such that everything u see works the opposite sense, like u can onli see things that are super close to ur face, like holding ur palms up to ur face, the rest are a blur. Ur eyes gets ultra sensitive to light, going out of the clinic could literally kill ur eyes bcos of the brightness, that is if u haven't kill urself by falling off the stairs. The doctors use some cool devices, with a super concentrated light beam that they shine into ur eyes and at that moment i could myself see all the nerves and watever shit myself from my own eyes. The doctor at the same time had sort of this glass that look like a magnifying glass at his eye to see wat's going on in my eyes....i remembered he made a nice little joke abt howi've got hole-ly eyes..yes pun intended..holy..eyes.Great. So on the same day i went for a lazer eye day operation which lasted less than 30 mins but was like hell. I was sitting up, resting my head n chin on this thing that looked more or less like the machine u see when u go for an eye checkup to determine ur degree at the optical shop. My head was there..i can't rem the details, something probably was strapped to prevent my head from pulling back. And the doctor would look into the machine n start his lazer treatment, basically directly the lazers into my retinal?! And hell it hurts, it's meant to patch up the holes u see. It hurts, i couldn't help closing my eye but i think there was something to hold up the eyelids..i wanted him to stop but he wouldn't anyway. so it hurts...finally it's over. I went home half blind bcos of the solution they had put in my eyes, i had both my eyes lazer-ed. From then on, i have this extra blood line on my right eye, remanant of that stupid operation that cost mi 1000+. I had to go back for followups. According to this nuh doctor, if i do not patch up the holes, it will become worse as yrs go by and if my retinal becomes badly damaged i'll go blind. According to then jiawei's specialist at gleneagles, it's ok to have the black dots..not neccessary a need for operation. Well i felt so cheated. Nuh doctor said if i see any more black dots i shd go back to him. Hell of cos i won't! Give him another chance to lazer my eyes issit! I can't help wondering if i would go blind one day. The dots are back. Once in a while i see them. Sighz...i'm living life on a contract, it almost feel like i'm having cancer. Touch wood...pui.
Hai enuff of my boring recounts of my life. So boring i don even have the motivation to write. Mayb next time i'll write abt some stories ..of my ..boring life...think that would b more interesting.
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